evening to all of you. i hope that your week has been lovely. mine has, albeit a lost diary.
i was travelling to my jazz gig tonight when the thought occured to me that people don't label me as "asian" as such. I'm not saying this is a bad thing; in fact, i think it is wonderful that i have formed a sense of identity that cannot be identified by a particular race's behaviour.
although, like many asians, i like organisation, and that can make me a bit of a control freak sometimes.
i feel that stereotypes in society are necessary to an extent. It's natural for the mind to associate a person's behaviour with a skin colour, a generalisation etc. what i think should be explored more often, however, is the formation of an undefinable and idiosyncratic identity. it's a fairly left wing idea (as are many of my ideas), but i get disheartened sometimes when people conform to what they think seems "cool", eg the jock culture in Australia and the notions of drinking and bj's and 'tits out for the boys' are just not "cool". It just leads to a path of social confusion, erosion of morals and a ignorant perspective of life.
i'm christian
i like metal
i'm straight edge (until i'm 18 for now (unless mitigating circumstances like the formal forces me to drink))
i'm of asian descent
i play guitar
i do no sciences
i want to be a rock star.
i love my family and friends so much that it's given me the trait of being self effacing.
people think i'm a banana, yellow on the outside and white on the inside. i prefer to think of myself as an apple. bite me.
Saturday, May 29, 2010
Monday, May 24, 2010
self effacing
it's the time of year when everyone is busy, when the average teenager questions his identity amidst a black sea of business. recently i hurt someone, and i feel horrible that i cannot go back and retreat my actions.
one of my greatest weaknesses is the ability to internalise the quintessential thoughts that govern my existence. sometimes i act really passive, trampled by the courageous voices of people who live life. when i do act, i am in constant scrutiny by my peers and by myself. instead of fixing a problem, i draw closer towards the corner of the wall.
it's times like this when i realise that human nature, myself included, can be so macchiaveliian, and self interest can distort our very social interactions. i know there is no such thing as a utopia, but to hurt any human being in any way is wrong.
miscommunication is the bane of human existence, and in the end, i know jack-shit about how to communicate my wants and needs to others. i am a pathetic being who wanders around in circles, falling over the same shoelaces I didn't tie hard enough.
i'm sorry that i have made mistakes that have killed another's sense of who they are. i am still struggling to come to terms with this.
one of my greatest weaknesses is the ability to internalise the quintessential thoughts that govern my existence. sometimes i act really passive, trampled by the courageous voices of people who live life. when i do act, i am in constant scrutiny by my peers and by myself. instead of fixing a problem, i draw closer towards the corner of the wall.
it's times like this when i realise that human nature, myself included, can be so macchiaveliian, and self interest can distort our very social interactions. i know there is no such thing as a utopia, but to hurt any human being in any way is wrong.
miscommunication is the bane of human existence, and in the end, i know jack-shit about how to communicate my wants and needs to others. i am a pathetic being who wanders around in circles, falling over the same shoelaces I didn't tie hard enough.
i'm sorry that i have made mistakes that have killed another's sense of who they are. i am still struggling to come to terms with this.
Sunday, May 9, 2010
a sense of direction in life
good evening my friends! I hope that you have had a wonderful and fruitful last few weeks :)
Kudos to Luc, Daniel, Jeremy and Jackson for coming to Trivia Night last night. We so should have won that weekend away :P To support Purcee, I decided a few months ago to try raise money for Zimele, a pledge that culminated last night as with the help of my parents and parishioners, we organised a Music and Movies Trivia Night. I'm so sorry if I didn't publicise this enough, and you wanted to come, but if you think that this is a good idea for charity, or just for fun, then let me know and we can perhaps organise another one.
We raised $1,200 last night. My oath. That puts 15 African young un's through school for a year, with one meal a day for themselves. How fantastic is the power of community to do good. I admire Mr Purcell so much for publicising Zimele, even to deaf ears. And I actually want to let him know that the unyielding force of charity that he is preaching is good. Now people can take the line of thought that we're just flinging money at charities, and they should bloody manage the distribution of money better than to ask for more money.
Tell me one con that negates charity work. There is no harm done by helping. Self preservation and consolidation might be necessary for us to form a sense of social identity; however, we need to think outside the four corners of the square to expand our ego boundaries.
To prevent me from going off-topic :P, I see that too often people, and especially year 12's, forget why they do what they do. A sense of social disorientation sets in about this time of the year, with exams and the dread of formal dates plaguing our minds, reinforcing a false illusion of apathy and consequently cynicism. We must love what we do. We're going forward in life. That's the beauty of life, and looking back, I will never regret any decision I have made.
+Have a lovely week+ I will write more after Gambier tour (next Friday-Sunday)
Kudos to Luc, Daniel, Jeremy and Jackson for coming to Trivia Night last night. We so should have won that weekend away :P To support Purcee, I decided a few months ago to try raise money for Zimele, a pledge that culminated last night as with the help of my parents and parishioners, we organised a Music and Movies Trivia Night. I'm so sorry if I didn't publicise this enough, and you wanted to come, but if you think that this is a good idea for charity, or just for fun, then let me know and we can perhaps organise another one.
We raised $1,200 last night. My oath. That puts 15 African young un's through school for a year, with one meal a day for themselves. How fantastic is the power of community to do good. I admire Mr Purcell so much for publicising Zimele, even to deaf ears. And I actually want to let him know that the unyielding force of charity that he is preaching is good. Now people can take the line of thought that we're just flinging money at charities, and they should bloody manage the distribution of money better than to ask for more money.
Tell me one con that negates charity work. There is no harm done by helping. Self preservation and consolidation might be necessary for us to form a sense of social identity; however, we need to think outside the four corners of the square to expand our ego boundaries.
To prevent me from going off-topic :P, I see that too often people, and especially year 12's, forget why they do what they do. A sense of social disorientation sets in about this time of the year, with exams and the dread of formal dates plaguing our minds, reinforcing a false illusion of apathy and consequently cynicism. We must love what we do. We're going forward in life. That's the beauty of life, and looking back, I will never regret any decision I have made.
+Have a lovely week+ I will write more after Gambier tour (next Friday-Sunday)
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