Introspection.

I love this instrumental. So much.
I wrote this with a positive lens. I had travelled, worked, and met some lovely people.
I found an energy within myself that to this day, I cannot express into words. The closest feeling I can associate it with, is God. It is only through introspection that we realise and actualise our fullest potential.

Mistakes.

Discomfited with the home of the mind,
Dissociated with the soul.
All these chains I see, is necessary,
All these things I know, is temporary.

Wash away the sins I've fallen into,
Wash away so I can now accept: pain, suffering, life.

The world is toppling down, the grass is always cut.
Why do busy people have their eyes sewn shut?
Where is my control?
I'm feeling like a rock, not ready to roll.

If love is life, then what is going on?
If love is life, then I'm a walking contradiction.

All we've got to do is keep it straight-forward, positive,
Rather than do backflips on the good ol' negative.
All we've got to do is keep it straight-forward, positive,
'Cos we know, we know, it's hard to do these days in this city place,
It's hard to do these days in this city haze.


Wash away the sins I've fallen into,
Wash away so I can now accept: pain, suffering, life.

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This song is about retaining your integrity even when life throws a curve ball at you. I wrote this at a time where I was struggling to find comfort in anything. Although the world may appear grey at times, it's important to spot a silver lining in the clouds to pull you through.

P.S Can anyone spot a grammar mistake?

leave it all behind, swim against the tide

and here we are. 2013.
i have not accessed this archive of memories in 2 years. wow.
reading my previous posts is nostalgic. i used to think a lot. i used to think too much.
and the past two years has made me realise that while it is good to be accountable for your actions, what do you achieve by taking your time with things, and being inhibited by insecurity? it's really surprising how much i've changed in 2 years. but the most important thing is that i'm willing to let go, and actually get more out of life as a result.

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here's a summary of what's happpened so far:
Music - so that band Pejorist? i still work with the same guys, and god bless them for being patient with me. we dropped the name Pejorist after a few lineup changes, and now are Rejuvenate. fingers crossed that two years from now, we're still together :)
         - i also front the methylated goats as a guitarist/vocalist. we're a 4-piece rock outfit, and definitely more mainstream than Rejuvenate. http://www.facebook.com/TheMethylatedGoats
Antioch - so i met some friends a few years back that dance, play music, and reflect upon life. we believe in god. there's been times where i've questioned and explored other paths of spirituality, but for now, the community of Antioch is here to stay
University/the arts student culture - i changed course from music industry to arts (international studies). i know, i'll be unemployed for the next few years, but i do enjoy learning the world's problems. i drink more as an arts student. i also listen to more indie music, and dress more mainstream.
Work - i left mcdonald's on a good note, and found another job as a kitchen hand not long after in chinatown. unfortunately, it didn't work out, and we mutually parted ways. time to troll seek.com.au
Travel - my gap year was amazing! going to the USA and Europe completely opened my eyes to new ways of living. i'll post pictures up soon.

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keep your eyes peeled: this blog will now serve as a platform to launch lyrics for my acoustic solo project, and a diary for achievements/travel for the future.

love all round,
justin

even though i'm on my own, i know that i'm not alone

this year has been fun :)
i hope everybody had a good easter, mother's day etc. it's good to spend time with the ones around you that you love.
update on my life?
2yr dryspell broken. i will know when the time is right for the perfect girl, but it's good to satisfy the oxytocin and testostorone in the meantime.

my band, Pejorist, is going well. look us up on facebook, we will be recording june-august.

i'm off travelling in a month. i will be gone for 2months to europe and the USA to find myself through family, friends and music. i work at mcdonalds to subsidise my trip.

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it's interesting looking back to the past, and seeing how you've changed, how you've stayed the same, and observe the same with the people around you.
for one, i don't say sorry for every single thing that goes on around me. i've also let go of some responsibility for other people's problems. taking time to respect one's self is far more efficient. if you have to give all of yourself to others, you might as well find out what 'all of yourself' means, integrity and dignity attached.

although i do miss the nice guy in me, and try to bring him out as much as possible :P

i've experimented. i've resisted. i've gained. i've lost. i've learnt.
but i take responsibility for everything that has happened to me.

distance draws people apart, but absence makes the heart grow fonder. the important friends always come back, and moments that transpire with these important ones are always refreshing. very relevant as humankind depends on mutualism and consistency for comfort.

i miss the times when all i knew was how to catch pokemon on gameboy, when every little triviality meant so much to me. but opening up to the present and the future is much more rewarding than aforementioned 'ignorant bliss'.
being strung-out by work or school is so unnecessary in the long run. cos life is a plethora, so many realms to explore, so many experiences to cherish.


hope all is well with uni/gap year guys! keep your hopes up high and your heads down low :)

justin

although our bodies grow stiffer with time, let's not let the same thing happen to our minds

o my goodness goodness!
an interesting time ahead. whilst many are off to university, a barren landscape lays for those taking a GAP year. a lonely time? I don't think so. Humans have to grab the bull by the horns when it comes to their future.

what's new so far?
I quit my job as a waiter at a Chinese restaurant...and got hired by Maccas! A downgrade? not really, it's 10 mins walk from my house, and I get paid more than 8 an hour.
I've met a few lovely characters at work. One's just so out there, open-minded yet reserved. we shall see what happens, because like me, she is quite unpredictable.
she did weed with me and smitty first time we met. that says something about her character.
my dream of starting a band is becoming more crystallised. first jam with a new drummer and bassist tomorrow, and i'm stoked as to how quick everything has happened.

prayers to Japan, and any country affected by the Pacific Rim earthquake/cyclones <3
the implications of the recent natural disasters are enormous, especially with nuclear infection being involved.

I hope that everyone is keeping well, safe, happy! Feel valued and fortunate to have such a colourful life :)

justin

holy shit

i try not to curse often
but oh my gosh, i feel special

there are some moments in life that cannot be repeated. these unbelievable moments are what we live for, as we purge our anxieties and past life, and step forward to the future with a clean slate, and a composed, tranquil and peaceful state of mind.

thank you to everyone who attended ROCKOFF yesterday! I feel so grateful to have a community of friends who are so generous and optimistic in their support.
Kalaharis, thank you for making us feel good! Your professionalism serves as an inspiration to any aspiring musician.
MK Delta, thank you for a gung-ho set, the PA, and the audio engineering you provided on the night!
I wish the above bands all the best for the future as they have a lot to offer in the rock arena. They're both very generous, and all round bonza individuals :)

Before I forget, I must thank B X TRA. Now many people might have noticed an Asian guy playing piano/violin whilst you were coming in. This man (real name bingxue) got back to me within one day of invitations. Commitment and talent right there. Hats off to you!

And who could forget my fellow cover musicians. You guys have coped with so much schedule-moving and a very erratic Justin. Thank you so much for performing with me!
Jerome Gilbert
Chris Smart
Nick Power
Michael Fernando
Dylan Smith
Jack Mason (who also provided lights and smoke machine. All the best for the future my friend, you deserve it!)
Nathan Harding
Kieran Lim
Tom Spink
Joe Fountain
James Faithfull

Roadies: Alastair Coulthard, David Cavallo
Artwork: Billy Exton
Setup: Jeremy Nolan (Hope you enjoy Tassie, Jezz), Braiden Asciak, Jackson Chen, Declan Hutchings, Kat Wong, Alex McKinlay (sorry if I forgot anybody)

A tremendous group operation guys! couldn't have done it without you :)

We have raised over $200, people! This is going to flood affected individuals in Queensland. If I can get around to it, I might do some screen printing, print Will Exton's image onto T-Shirts, and they'll go on sale for $10, all proceeds to Queensland again. If you're interested, let me know :) it's a good reminder of the night.

i am indebted to everyone who came. thanks for the love :)
feel good, stay safe, have fun this year!
Justin

something need doin?

oh my
what a weekend! learned so much these last few days, it's not funny.
1) mates are important in life. bros before hos; HOWEVER, it is always good to have a balance of both.
2) living in the moment is fun, just don't let alcohol alter your behaviour too much
3) business cards are a great way of meeting people :)
4) nice guys finish last. girls don't like push-overs for a hookup or bf.
5) if you're insecure, stroke the furry wall :P nah, if you're insecure, drinking more alcohol does not help.
6) i'll sleep anywhere, so long as it gives me a good night's sleep.
7) started working at a chinese restaurant as a waiter, and officially stuffed up 4 orders today. regardless of how much customers and workers yell at you, keep composed, and don't be too hard on yourself.
8) if you're stressed, don't beat yourself up about it. talking to friends is a lot more therapeutic.
9) self esteem is the esteem of your freaking self! find ways of making yourself feel important.

yeh busy at this end. ROCKOFF! soon too...along with b'day in a few days. i'm taking life one day at a time.

hope all is well with everyone :)
justin